Cosas que decir y que no decir en un juicio

If you're a litigant, let's start with what you don't say.

You don't say:

1. Knock off this shit Judge...You're killing me.
2. Who paid you off?
3. Judge, are you sleeping with the other attorney?
4. Sheesh Judge...What side of the bed did you get up on this morning?
5. Judge, did you ever try a little Phillips Milk of Magnesia?
6. Objection! I object to the whole damn system!! Contempt??!! Ha!! Throw me in jail! I don't give a damn!!
7. Judge, I pay my taxes! You work for me damn it! I demand justice!
8. Judge, are you going for a damn record? So far you've sustained every one of their objections and none of mine?
9. Take off that damn robe and stand up to me like a man, you wuss!
10. This is why they passed the Second Amendment Judge.
11. Siek Heil!
12. If I slip you a fatter envelope than he did, will you give me a break?
13. How much did you pay to get your appointment?
14. Judge, do you have a cousin named Saddam?
15. What? Is there a problem with my deodorant?

Now for what you might say... Where applicable and where appropriate, you might try one, some or all of the following:

1. Good morning, your honor.
2. Objection.
3. With all due respect, your honor, Objection.
4. Please note my strenuous objection your honor.
5. Thank you, your honor.
6. If your honor pleases.
7. May we approach the bench please, your honor...
8. With all due respect your honor, I believe you are prejudicing me by your rulings in this case.
9. With all due respect your honor, I believe I am entitled to respect in this courtroom.
10. With all due respect your honor, I am attempting to try my case, and I feel you are interfering with my efforts.
11. With all due respect your honor, I believe you are demonstrating bias in this case, and it is prejudicing me in my case.
12. I move for recusal.
13. I move for a mistrial.

Enviado por: Ashcraft & Gerel a: [lawtalk]